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Wednesday, 30 January 2013

Old Friends

By Marcy Belson

This morning, reading Lyn's tribute to her friend, Mary, has opened the floodgates to my storehouse of memories. A lifetime of good friends, so many stories, so many good times together. They are all gone, my friends, amazingly so.

My cousin Katie has said several times, how terrible it is that I have lost all of my old friends. Well, I guess everyone does, I just lost mine a little sooner than later.

Roberta taught me how to entertain, how to interact with those who might not be friends, how to laugh...

OldFriendsBelsonfamily photos, Europe, Canada 014

...and see the small wildflowers in my path.

Marj showed me another world. She was a policewoman in the days when there were few women in the field and she was tested, each and every day.

OldFriendsBelsonfamily photos 008

She was a loving friend, always there for me. A phone call, after we each moved from our hometown, every Saturday morning. She was a sister to me, she was my best friend.

Harriette was a professor who came into my life in her retirement. We were quilters, frequently having meals together and always game to see what was new in our world. My last email from her was a recipe. She sent me "care" packages after we moved from the city, always food.

Jean traveled yearly from the South to her second home in the Northwest. Caring and careful, she planned roadtrips and events to keep us in touch.

In front of the doorway to a quilt shop in Pousbo, Washington, is a tile that says, "In Friendship, Marcy and Jean, New Best Friends and Quilters.”

Under that tile is another with "Husbands of Quilters, Gordon and Bob.” It says "new best friends" because when in passing I mentioned my best friend Marj, Jean said she would be my "new best friend.”

Suzanne, ah what a woman. I remember sitting in the sand watching the bathtub races with her. I remember another sandy beach in Mexico where we spent the morning making "sand candles" with Suzanne as our teacher.

OldFriendsBelsonPTDC0057

We visited each other, either in person or by phone, all over the USA.

Bennie, my traveling friend. We circled much of the globe with our husbands from Hawaii to Paris and Rome. We were fearless and we had stories to tell endlessly, mostly with laughter as part of the story.

In recent years, the loss of many newer friends in the Northwest has left me feeling bereft but I also know I have been blessed with friendship with all of these women - smart, talented and happy to share their lives with me.

Now, I march to my own drummer and remember a time when I marched with a cadre of good friends, old friends.


[INVITATION: All elders, 50 and older, are welcome to submit stories for this blog. They can be fiction, non-fiction, poetry, memoir, etc. Please read instructions for submitting.]

Posted by Ronni Bennett at 05:30 AM | Permalink | Email this post

Comments

Thank you for sharing the pictures and stories.

Dear Marcy: Keep up that steady drum beat for even if you are marching alone, memories will flood into your mind, and those many happy moments will being a smile to your face and peace to your being.

Just beautiful, I have found in my life that friends make memories, not events..hard to lose them, but good to remember the time spent together..I once read or heard you should make a good friend every decade so that you keep your supply replenished..I have tried to do that..like all of us, I am starting to lose my oldest friends..nothing can replace them, but glad to have the "decade" friends around too...

I've found that I wouldn't be nearly as happy without my women friends. My husband is a close companion, but my women friends fill a need in so many areas of my life that my husband can't touch. Very important to be conscious about keeping those friendships alive.

What a lovely tribute to your friends,Marcy. I have lost more than Mary, too--some to death and some to alzheimers, as well as moving far away. I realized a few years ago that I'd better cultivate some younger friends, and I did. Some of my closest friends now --all women, --are 7 to 25 years younger and I am so blessed that they want to be around me.
Today I adopted a forever friend & companion--a 4-year-old kitty, and I'm sure I'll be showing her off soon in a blog--can't wait to get at it, in fact. My younger friends helped me to achieve this--laying in supplies, and driving me to the rescue place. It is the first day I haven't cried since I knew Mary's death was imminent a little over a month ago, so I know for me it's a wonderful comfort for a painful loss.

Lyn, I'm glad you have adopted a friend. I have a 4 legged friend named Zippy, a tabby who runs to the door each time the bell rings, he thinks he is the watchdog!

Lyn and Marcy, you inspire me with your thoughts. Thank you so much for sharing.

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