Do You Lie About Your Age? (Part 2)

More than three years ago in these pages, I wrote a story titled, Do You Lie About Your Age? A few day ago, an “almost 25” year-old named Sue left this comment on that story that reflects the sentiments I see regularly on blogs by 20-somethings (30-somethings and up too):

“I didn’t read the whole article and yes, I hate getting older. Since society thinks old=bad, used, bitter, worn out, just "OLD"...not new, not active, so yesterday.”

For such a short comment, there is a lot to be disturbed about. Sue isn’t wrong about the culture’s prevailing definition of old and she “hates getting older” at 25? What, I wonder, could she be reacting to? What are we teaching our young women (and men?) about life?

Youth is a wonderful time. I wouldn’t have skipped it for anything even though, from this vantage point, I realize I could be superficial, overconfident, silly and, among other things, dumb about too much then – sort of like I am now sometimes.

But youth is not a time when anyone should be worried about getting old. I couldn’t imagine what life would be like at 67 when I was 25 (nor did I care much; it seemed so impossibly far in the future), and I spent a whole lot more time fearing death than age.

Now the concern is reversed in the sense that I hope not to continue living should physical or mental debility render me helpless.

As to Sue’s other point, that old equals “used, bitter, worn out, not new, not active, so yesterday”, let’s dispense with “not new” and “so yesterday” first. Those two characteristics are usually of importance only to young people to whom being au courant is essential. There was a time when I wouldn’t be caught dead in last year’s shoes or hair style. Young people eventually outgrow it.

What bothers me more are “used” and “bitter,” particularly the latter. Where did that idea come from? I’ve known a few bitter people over the years, but they were not old. They were all ages (one at age 37) and just bitter whatever their reasons. Old and bitter are not synonyms.

Negative beliefs about elders keep young people from wanting to know us leading to age discrimination in the workplace and healthcare industry, scare the bejesus out of young people and allow us to be portrayed on television, in books and movies and in general conversation as Sue describes, perpetuating those beliefs. (There is some small amount of improvement recently, which I’ll write about next week.)

Which brings me back to lying about our age.

How are young people going to get past the cultural myths about old people if we don’t show them? There are many ways to do that, but one is be real about the number of years we have lived. If we lie about our age, we are telling our children and other young people that it is shameful to grow old and that’s not something I’ve noticed among TGB readers here or on their blogs. Almost to a man and woman, we repeatedly say we wouldn’t want to be younger.

So: I’m 67 and will be 68 in about three months. How about you?

[At The Elder Storytelling Place today, Kate Johnston writes about Outliving My Mother.]

Comments

[Mike Nichols]

I'm 61 and will be 62 on March 1, Lord willin' and the Creeks don't rise. I've never hidden my age; I'm just glad I'm here, given the circumstances.

Our daughter is 19, and most of her friends are shocked when I tell them my age. They think I'm much younger, I suppose because I don't act "bitter" or "worn out." (It can't be the way I look, since I resemble Santa Claus in more ways than one!) I think that many young people's attitudes would change if they were in regular contact with older people.

Alas, that's getting more and more unlikely, given the fragmentation of families and the wholesale cleansing of older people from the workforce. The stereotypes in the media don't help any, either.

[lilalia]

51 and hopeful... I didn't know if I should laugh or cry at Sue's comment. I think what she is in need of is advice or just a good elder friend or mentor. My heavens, we are not all the same, are we? There is nothing better to dispel one's own fears (or learn to speak French) than to love someone (or a French lover). Someone who lives that what we fear with courage and optimism.

[m.e.]

do i lie about my age (72)? never. but often people seem to think i look much younger, and they also seem to think this is a huge compliment when they tell me. it's just genetics. my mother had the same experience.

[Nanaa]

I'm looking forward to my marker Medicare birthday in June, turning 65. I work with nearly all much younger people, some of whom I am more optimistic and spirited than they are. They have a difficult time believing my age, which I do not hide, and I have more energy than some of them. I tell them this is what 64 should be like!

[doctafill]

I am 65, and on that recently defining day, I went downtown Montreal and got my senior bus pass. You should see the big smile on my face in that photo. Never lied about my age and am proud to be healthy at 65 and gardening for people who can't touch their toes or lean over far enough to crank off a fart. And some of them are wayyy younger than I.

I'm on the beach in Clearwater, looking for the yoga classes and will walk at least an hour a day here. I wish everyone would stop lying about their age as it perpetuates negative stereotypes.

Bitter is what I called some, not all, teachers I worked with. Only in their 30's, they were angry and bitter about everything from no boyfriend prospects, to kids in their classes, to you name it.Bitter is generation x when they want all of us boomers and older, to take off forever on an ice floe, and leave our hard work, jobs and money to them.

I see it every time I am in a mall, being served by surly xers- and I don't mean ALL of them. Want something? Go work for it, and don't blame seniors.
It's a big wold out there, room for everyone, so go get your boat of life and learn to paddle it.

[kenju]

I'm 68 and I never lie about my age - what's the point? My mom used to say if you want to lie about your age - tell people you are 5-10 years older than you really are. That way they'll say "Doesn't she look GOOD for her age!"

Bitterness is not age-specific! Joy isn't either. Attitude is the most important factor - including health - in determining a person's day to day life and how they are perceived by others.

I have several friends who are 10-20 years younger than I am and obviously they don't mind being with me. Some people are appealing at any age and others are old at 30.

[Pamela]

I'll be 68 in a month's time and it bothers me not (although, where did the time go - it whooshed by). I met a lovely old gent of 90 today, who moved here alone to Spain 5 years ago; he does all his own domestic chores and enjoys life here. What an inspiration.

[Steven]

I never lie about my age. (68) In fact, I find chronological age to be of little importance and potentially divisive and so I rarely mention it. I'm old, an elder, and any fool can see it. It doesn't necessarily make me wiser, but it helps...a little. I have been an idiot at age 25, 35, 45, 55 and 65. Hopefully I will get a chance to do it again when I'm 75!

No generation has a monopoly on wisdom. And that's my strongly held opinion...until I change it.

[Alexandra]

I will turn 62 in April and am beginning to feel my age. My husband is 70. People often think we are younger, because of appearance and because we run a B&B, which takes a lot of energy. We never lie about our ages. Just this week I told my husband he needs to accept getting older, as he has been fighting the whole idea. Take a nap, if he feels tired, etc. And let his children understand the same behaviors he exhibited at 40 and 50 are no longer reasonable and should not be expected. Western society has such a long way to go in its comprehension of old age. As more and more people live into old age, thanks to new meds, and become aged, perhaps the rest of the population will adjust their understanding? Recently there were two articles in US News & World Report, Dec. 15th: The Older-Worker Advantage and A Spreading Appreciation for the Benefits of Hospice Care. I hope this was not a fluke and that more such pieces will follow. The more younger people hear/learn about old age, the more they will relinquish outdated ideas/impressions like those of the young lady you quoted that we are bitter, etc.

[soon-to-be-sixty-one]

On my 30th birthday I thought my life was over, I was old. On that day I happened to run into a woman who was celebrating her 45th birthday, all bouncy and excited and happy about it.

Feeling very glum and morose, and indeed dumbfounded by her apparent happiness on her birthday, I said, I just turned 30, does it every get any better?

She said, Let me think, where was I when I turned 30? Oh yes, I was in jail, yes, it gets better!

And it did. I don't think I've ever felt as old again as I did on my 30th birthday, when my life was over.

[mary walker]

I have lied about many things in the past but never my age. I don't lie often any more--the consequences and the energy wasted are too painful. I will be 60 in April. I have enjoyed most of those years. And even the least enjoyable moments I wouldn't trade or wish away. Nor do I want my youth back. I am a better person now than I was then and I intend to make the trend continue,

[Kay Dennison]

I'm 61 and will be 62 in April and I don't lie about it either. Some days I feel every day of those years; others I feel like a teenager. I'm just going to bop 'til I drop and hopefully have fun doing it as long as I can.

My mother at 83 is mean, nasty and bitter and remembers every little bad thing people have allegedly said or done to her. She is the sort of elder who gives us a bad name. She is in better health than I am but her soul is dead. I feel sorry for her and anyone like her. And no matter what she thinks, I don't want a plug nickel of her damned money.

I've often joked that should I come into lots of money, I'm going to spend some of it on riotous living and waste the rest.

I believe that Dylan Thomas had it right:
"Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light."

[possumlady]

I'm excited to be turning 50 this year!! I've never lied about my age. I, too, am blessed with genetics from my mother that give me a more youthful appearance. Honestly, I feel that having a few more pounds on me helps too. Not one wrinkle on my face or a sagging neck. Now, a double chin is a different matter ;-)

I remember when I was on my dream vacation, a safari to East Africa in 1996. I went alone but became very close with everyone in my group. The women one day were talking about chemical peels. I said I'd never get one. One woman said "just wait until you hit 30, then your skin changes and you will think differently." I smiled and said I was 37. They honestly didn't believe me and I had to show them my drivers license!

[Marian Van Eyk McCain]

Half way to 73 and no, I have never once lied about my age. My mother did - just once, when she was applying for a new teaching job at 63 and discovered that the school Board had set a compulsory retiring age of 65. The head teacher interviewing her, who was 58, suggested the lie because she wanted to employ my mother. So the two of them colluded to fudge the paperwork. Seven years later, they both retired, on the same day. They were best friends by then. And they often used to giggle about the naughty fib that began their friendship.

[Marian Van Eyk McCain]

(PS: When I said 'half way to 73', I meant I'm 72 and a half. Sorry. Didn't mean to confuse you.)

[Darlene]

Lie about my age? Heck no; I'm old enough at 83 to brag about it.

[Darlene]

Lie about my age? Heck no; I'm old enough at 83 to brag about it.

[Celia Andrews]

I'll be 67 on St. Patrick's Day and the only time I lied about my age was in college when I wanted to buy a drink. I'm what my grandmother called a late bloomer. Had my kids late, when I was more pleasant and patient. At age 50 I learned to travel on my own, a joyous experience. I remarried at 61 after 10+ pleasant years alone and enjoy growing our relatively new relationship we now have. Yes, kids, older people still like and need affection, conversation, and sex. I have some health problems, but they are the same ones I had at 10 or 45 for all of that, just not quite as easy to handle. I have problems same as anyone but a long life has taught me that nothing stays the same and if you are still breathing in the morning you get another chance to do better.

[janinsanfran]

I'm 61 and it has not occurred to me to lie about it. I look it, I think. Not sure what 61 looks like.

I'm interested in the adjective "bitter." It seems to be an insult -- to use it is to say something very bad about a person. Are we implying that cheerfulness is compulsory?

When I think of "bitter" I think of my partner's deceased mother, a person who felt aggrieved by life, disappointed that things had not been different. She was a sad person, not cheerless, but trapped in habitual melancholy. I don't think of that description as an insult; rather as sympathetic observation. No one should have to feel so trapped.

Sorry -- all that is off-topic. It's been noodling in the back of my brain since last spring when our President-elect got in trouble for using the word "bitter".

[Anne Gibert]

I don't lie about anything as a rule, and certainly not my age. My problem seems to be telling too much. In 3 years I will be 80, and I can feel myself slowing down. I roared through my 60's, went back-packing in New Zealand and got married in my early 70's, but now I see that the time comes when you need to lead a gentler life and accept some imitations. Not giving up, just living in the real world.
It's interesting that the young woman didn't read the whole article. Perhaps when she's 60 she'll read to the end and think for a minute or two before she makes a judgement.

[millie garfield]

Never lied about my age and at 83 I'm proud of my age and have never been more "me" than I am now!

[Elaine of Kalilily]

I will be 69 in March, and like others who have commented here, I've lied about some things over the course of my lifetime, but never my age. The realities of what it means to be my age are quickly catching up to me, however -- especially as I tried to play a memory game with my 6 year old grandson and had to realize his memory is better than mine.

[Sarah]

As a 27-year-old, the comment from Sue makes me sad. As I have commented here before, I enjoy being around older people and do not hold negative stereotypes of them. Perhaps because I am mature in attitudes for my age, I enjoy being at age where I am not just tossed aside as a college student but rather am taken seriously as an adult. I would never lie about my age but I do have the (blessing?) of looking quite young for my age. In general, I try to just enjoy life and enjoy whatever age I am.

I am also disturbed by the way Sue starts her comment - "I didn't read the whole article". At least she is honest, but this seems so sadly characteristic of young people these days, so much in a rush that they can't take the time to read a whole blog post. Heh, if anything apparently I hold more stereotypes of young people than older people :-p

[Cowtown Pattie]

I sometimes put off-the-wall dates on some online info sheets just because of security reasons, not vanity. Funny, I usually make myself much older when I pick a date at random.

I recently got lots of birthday wishes at Facebook (I haven't decided if I want to keep that darned thing up) because I filed my profile birthday as 01-01-1929.

I do resent having to select an age and income column when at certain sites. Depends on how badly I want to sign up or do whatever it is that requires this crapola.

I usually want to check:

Nun-ya>/i>

[Rain]

I turned 65 in October. I don't have the exact number in my profile on my blog although I had it there. I don't like to make a big deal over my birthdays and so now say mid 60s to avoid having to change it when one rolls around. I do though mention my exact years every so often in the blog as recently as with Christmas this year. I would never lie about it as what good would that do for friendships or anything else.

Turning 65 was significant for going onto the Social Security system and having to deal with all of the complications of that; but otherwise, it was just a birthday. I am anticipating 70 being more meaningful (should I make it there) as for me it is the decades that have been.

[Lonely Rivers]

At sixty three I am the oldest person at my work and I love the fact that my fabulous coworkers tell me about their lives, invite me to their gatherings and sometimes seek my opinion. Since I have ALWAYS looked older than my age, I am ALWAYS prepared for folks to hide their surprised look when I tell people my real age ("like wow, I thought you were way older!")..and then the quick recovery as if being even older than I am would be an insult! I have an amazing role model in my mother - who at 89 (and looks every minute of it!) is always dreaming up more fun for the rest of the folks at her assisted living home.

[la peregrina]

That old = bitter remark was interesting. I find bitterness to be a personality trait that has nothing to do with age. Bitter people are the ones who have always seen their glass as three-quarters (or more) empty.

Oh, and I am 57 and will be 58 in June.

[Claire Jean]

I feel very much as you Ronni regarding my age. I work with people who are younger, much younger. I find it interesting how some relate to me very comfortably. We’re actually friends. We exchange stories about their children who are the ages of my grandchildren, places to eat, movies to see, etc. I also find it interesting, and, admittedly sad, when sensing discomfort from others. Luckily there are people my age working in other departments to compare stories with and have a good laugh.
In today’s letters to the editor in the local paper, Mr. Doll wrote the following: Test older drivers and save lives--I believe all men and women over the age of 62, and especially over the age of 65, should be tested for their driving ability twice a year. You never know when a person’s reflexes start to go downhill. If a person is 65 or older and crashes into a store or a house or a garage or hits the gas pedal instead of the brakes, he or she should lose his or her license for good, because a life could be saved or injuries avoided.
I’ll be 67 in March and can’t help but wonder what Mr. Doll might be writing when he is a so-called older person.

[sablonneuse]

I've never lied about my age (just turned 64) but will admit to feeling pleased on the odd occasion when people have said they thought I looked younger.
I do remember a colleague at school trying to lie for me though. My son was in her class (he was 5 at the time) and I went in to see her for something.
"Oh, it's Mrs. P's birthday today," the teacher announced. "She's eighteen".
"No she's not," piped up my son, "She's 34!"

[Francine Hardaway]

I will be 68 in May. Outside of the financial problems we all have, I love my life. I never lie about my age, and I love it when people are stunned that a person who acts and looks like I do can actually be old, too.

[Nancy]

No, Ronni, I am 80 years old and I have NEVER lied about my age.

I lie about my kid's age. When my son was going to be 40 I told everybody he was 39....

I like being 80. Everybody wants to give me a discount or carry my bags to the car or let me go ahead of them at the movies. It's great!

I have told you before that I exercise and eat well and I pour a bucket of L'Oreal Ash Blonde # 14 over my head once a month and people tell me I only look 79! What more could I want?

[George P]

I'll be 74 in June and have always looked much younger than my chronological age (genes from my mother). In high school I looked like I should have been in the 6th grade and was frequently pulled over by the police because they didn't think I was old enough to drive. Hence, the one time in my life that I lied about my age I got caught.

When I was 17 I decided that I wanted to join the Navy, but my father wouldn't sign the papers to allow me to enlist (you can enlist at age 18 without parental permission). So I went to the city hall, got a copy of my birth certificate, and altered one digit to make me 18. Twas a fine job of forgery, undetectable as far as I was concerned.

The Navy recruiter had me fill out all the forms, then informed me that since I was 18, I had to register for the draft at the Selective Service office. After I left the recruiter, he called ahead and told them that he was quite sure that I wasn't 18, more like 14, and that they should check it out. So, they called the city hall and got my correct age. When I walked into the office and unannounced who I was and what I was there for, a kindly woman who could barely hide a big smile took me aside and informed me that they were on to my little scheme and, though it was a nice try, I'd have to wait until I was 18.

Conclusion! I waited and enlisted when I was 18. Never tried anything like that again. From then on, if anyone asked my age, I told them the truth.

[chancy]

I just turned 79 in December so in one year I have a really big birthday coming.
I have gone along with a lie about my age. When I was 5 years old my friend Catherine's older brother, Dick, would take us to the "picture show" on Saturdays. At age 5 the admission was 10 cents. At 6 it was 25 cents. Dick told the cashier Catherine and I were both just 5. He pocketed the savings and took us to the dime store and we all splurged on penny candy.
Oh and Yes,when I was 14 and wanted to work part time and had to be 15 to work and get a SS card I lied and filled out SS form to make myself a year OLDER. I did not end up working that year but I lived in fear until I was 65 and signed up to get SS benifits that the feds would come and get me then :)

[Linda ((SE PA)]

Age for me, at least in personal philosophy, has been a number.

I was adopted by older parents - mother was 41 years of age, so I was raised a bit differently than most growing up in the 50's. My immediate relatives were older and so were immediate friends. I didn't notice any "difference" until I started school and realized my classmates mothers were younger and there were visible differences. Yet, some "kernels" get planted, before we start school and I was brought up to always be polite to adults and show respect. Manners were of the utmost importance as well as being well behaved.

In some ways and in retrospect, I realize that I was a Little Adult before my time. It was easier for me to be around adults than children my own age or a bit older.

I sense that feelings and impressions regarding old people comes from immediate environment as well as lack of positive coverage from the media.

I remember the whoopla about the Dynasty ladies who made 40 a "whole new chapter" for women - then came, women of the 50's. We have many positive role models and we should do our best effort to do our part in our surroundings, immediate family, friends etc. Lead by example.

[Ocean]

No, can't think of any time that I've ever lied about my age. I'll soon be 66 and think I probably look that age, if not older.

If younger women don't see role models for aging women, perhaps it's because they don't "see" older women. If we spend our time dyeing our hair or rejuvenating our faces, or having face lifts, or smearing on winkle creams -- then it seems that we're denying younger women an accurate image of the vitality of us 'older' women.

Let's live our 'old age' with our gray hair and wrinkles and sags -- and smiles and laughs -- and be the positive role models that we are for the Sues of the world to aspire to. How much better to look like a Jessica Tandy than to have the plastic faces of so many older actresses who try to deny their ages and thereby spoil the beauty of aging.

[George Jenkins]

I don't lie about my age. Never. I enjoy sharing my age. I am proud of my age. People usually guess that I am 10 years young than I am. I am 53.

George
Editor
http://ivebeenmugged.typepad.com

[Colleen]

Nope, never lied about it - ummm, except for the fake IDs in the late 60's to go to Georgetown bars...
Will be 59 in April.

[Linda]

I'm 61 and look it since I have gray hair (tempered a bit by some remaining brown). The lines around and under my eyes don't help. I've never tried to hide my age and in fact didn't dye my hair because I fundamentally feel that "this is who I am." But I have to admit that since most women my age color their hair - including most of my female friends - it sometimes makes me think I made a mistake. But not enough to want to do it now.

Mostly when I think about my age I just can't believe how fast I got here. But overall I would say that I'm comfortable with my life and consider myself so blessed that I'm able to think about what I want to do in this next stage. Exciting, but just a little scary.

[DW]

50. Dunno why all those cute young guys are always still smiling at me... must think I'm a cougar...

Oh, and I can keep up with most of 'em in yoga class, too. Need to get back to that again!

I haven't lied about my age since I was 17 and borrowed a friend's ID to get into a bar. ;^)

[Mage B]

Lying never works, but I must say I am the only woman in my 1960's group that hasn't had their chin lifted. Did I say that. Some parts of me continue to wear out and get repaired. I'm grateful I have medical insurance or I would be on the beach or in the weeds.

Happy new year.....

[Beverly]

I always tell my age, which is 61. Every time I tell my age to anyone who is in their 20's, they are shocked. I think their idea of 61 is a bent over old lady who cannot walk.

If I tell anyone over 50 my age, they just smile. I don't know what to think of this, and I do not care...

I try to never lie. It takes too much energy. I dont like it when people lie to me. I'm 56

[Joy D]

I've always told my age but don't tell my weight. All those years teaching, I'd tell the students my age. I'm 65.

Don't underestimate being a cougar, DW. LOL (depending on their age, of course)

[Mary Joan Koch]

I will be 63 1/2 January 17. I have never lied about my age. I have always enjoyed being older and wiser than my five younger brothers. In the 7 years we have been married, no one has asked me if my English husband, 16 years younger, is my son:) I am glad he has a beard; it makes him look older.

When my mother died, almost 5 years ago, we had to ask the undertaker to touch up her roots, so loved ones viewing her open casket wouldn't realize she was old. My mother had been dyeing her hair for 50 years. That was a moment of truth for me. I decided to revert to my all-silver-gray hair. Going gray was an interesting experience. My hair gets more compliments than my brown hair, either natural or dyed,
ever did.

I have finally discovered the recipe for a good picture of me. Lots of silver hair, big smile, newest grandchild, no profile or chin.

[Peggy]

I won't lie about my age. Whether somebody gets TOLD how old I am depends on who is asking and why they want to know.

I have never wished I was younger though I do miss my younger body. On the flip side, I remember quite vividly wishing I was older, even at 25. The young don't get the respect that elders get. "You're not old enough to . .. drink in pubs, be a manager, know what we're talking about" You name it!

[mythster]

My daughter and I had a little discussion a couple of days ago about how we count ages. I had my 74th birthday in September and as far as I'm concerned, I'm in my 75th year and when people ask my age now I say "75". I can't imagine why anyone would add or subtract a year- if they want to lie about their age is as somebody said here, lie outrageously. Take five or ten years off your age and see if you can carry it off.

[Julie]

I had to laugh, at 25 someone thinks they are growing old? I am 57 and while the reality of the world tells me I am growing old, every part of me inside tells me I am not old, I am experienced and with the experience I gain over time I become even more valuable every day.

But I can identify with the comment about how young people don't want to know us because we are older and to them a waste of time.

Let me tell you a little about myself.

At 54 I went into The Art Institute of Phoenix and signed up to pursue a B.A. degree in Graphic Design. I was scared to death that I had no talent any longer (I had a lot when 16 and 17) or was just too old. But something kept me going, probably my thinking that I am still 20'something instead of 54.

I have endured many many comments that are negative, things like, "Your nearly 60, what the hell do you know?" when working on a group project and offering an idea… to things like, "you're a brown noser or kiss asser", because I come in with all my assignments completed and mounted and done exactly like the professors ordered. I even had one of my professors tell me they would not hire me because of my age… HIS loss…. for I meet deadlines, I get the work done and what may be "rusty" as talent is still good and passed by my ability to see around proverbial corners, to anticipate problems, to work hard and diligently for what I want and to push myself for myself not anyone else.

The kids that take the time to get to know me say that I set the bar and make them all work harder. The kids that don't get to know me and judge by society's standards, sit and mumble little rude remarks that can be overheard. And some really don't notice or care, which is like my Grandmother use to tell me, "For every 15 people you meet, 5 will love you, 5 will hate you and 5 won't really care. So do the right thing, don't hurt anyone, don't use anyone and don't try to impress anyone but yourself" and that is the truth in any situation and words I live by.

Its sad that those nay slayers and critics are so closed minded and prejudice. I shake my head and keep moving.

That first week of class was 3 years ago and I am proud to say that I have maintained a 3.8 GPA (darn Algebra dragged me down a bit 9 my artist brain just doesn't wrap that way) and I am on the last 3 classes before I walk the stage and get handed that piece of paper that I have wanted for so long. At the age of 57 I will be the oldest one up there in human years…but in inspirational years, in years of experience, I will be far more younger and open minded then more then half of them beside me.

You see I don't have to lie about my age because I am doing things to be alive and positive about myself and life. I am living my dreams and not sitting on the sidelines wishing and hoping.

Is it scary? Sure, the most difficult and nerve-wracking thing I had to do was attend my first week of classes. But over these past years, I have proven myself to the teachers and the students.

Most of these kids have enormous talent, more then I do actually, and while a few of them use it wisely, so many think that talent is all that it takes. But at this age, I realize that the actual design talent is a big factor, however, what really completes the total package is work ethics, the ability to problem solve in sometimes very creative and unusual ways to get the job done (one thing I am great at) and at this age I leave nothing to chance or the last minute. I get it done as far in advance as I can and I move on doing what needs to be done. And with age comes the ability to know people, to really see them and to approach them in a different way than many younger people do. Also keeping an open mind, embracing the new things that come along and realizing that change is vital in our lives, that change is fantastic, its what keeps us challenged and what makes us realize we ARE alive.

Growing old is scary only when we don't live in the "now" when we fail to see all that we have to offer and we let life be something we observe instead of embrace.

25 is old? I have shoes and jewelry older then that… 25 should enjoy 25 and pray for 26 and higher for every day, every year, every moment is a blessing.

I joke about SallieMae being paid still with my social security checks when they start coming, but with all the school debt it is true. I can only hope and pray that the people hiring others will be open minded and not let my age be an obstacle to them especially now that the economy is so difficult. I might not set the world on fire with my designs, then again, maybe I might, but either way, I will definitely give anyone more bang for their buck when they hire me.

P.S. You should have seen the boy's face that had told me I am a waste because I am nearly 60 when the real client we are working for in one of our classes picked my design for a brochure style. Not bad for a, "….you know nothing…" huh?

[Susanne]

I can do one better than the 25-year-old. When I was in my late 20s, I knew a young woman who, at 19 (19!), was lamenting (deeply disturbed even) turning 20. My 28th birthday was coming up soon and she asked me if I was upset about it. I haven't known anyone, before or after, who was dreading getting older at 19. I can't imagine what she is like 34 years later -- if she is still among us now.

[Georjina]

I don't lie about my age because it's no ones business except those who need to know. I operate my life, always have pretty much, on a need to know basis.

As for the Sue comment whose entire vocabulary exhibits a lack of reality or individual thought...please, learn to read.

Some of us have seen the reality of death up close, walked in the shoes of being considered inferior 'minorities' or slept in bombed out buildings hoping not to be found.

Not all youth are stupid or insipid nor can labels define the life of the aged.

[Audrey]

I'll be 71 in March and never lie about it. I used to think it was a high compliment whenever someone told me I didn't look my age, but now I suspect that it is, as others have noted, because the other person holds an image of a 70-year-old as impossibly decrepit and bent over. I'll admit I feel that way some days,

[Claude]

I am 64 and have never lied about my age, nor think I ever will!
Apart from my teenage years, which are years of intense suffering for lots of teenagers, and my late thirties, when I was trying to have a child and felt the biological clock was ticking away I've always been pleased with whatever age I was. I can't say that I am looking forward to growing older, but I don't mind either. I find life pretty interesting and surprising.

[Cop Car]

At age 14, I said I was 16, in order to get a job (which I got). In my 20s, I told the guys at work that I was in my 30s--as a lark. I looked older than my age and they "bought" it. Now, I am 70 (going on 71). The only direct evidence that I have for people's considering being old, bad, is that some younger people insist that they are shocked when they learn my age. Yeah, right.

[Joan Barber]

Loved the post, loved all the comments. No, I do not lie about my age, but I have experienced age discrimination on the job because of hiring practices by "25-somethings" who have bought into the myth of old=worn out, useless, etc. I am a fabulous 58 and proud of it. Sure, I wish I was as strong and flexible as I was when I was 38 (maybe I should go to the gym more) and I'd like to be able to dance for hours but I'm not bitter about it because I sure had a great time doing it when I could! One thing getting older can give you that you can never get when you are younger and that no amount of cosmetic surgery can take away is experience, which, if you are lucky leads to wisdom. And wisdom leads to the opportunity to become even more attractive than you ever were when you were young. For anyone out there reading this who hasn't seen what three wacky and wise "seniors" can do with their spare time, check out "50todeath.com."

[Peter Tibbles]

I don't lie about my age (63), but then the topic doesn't come up very often. It did once recently when I was chatting to the guy who runs the food place near work. We have similar tastes in music and this is unusual as he has just turned 40. He asked me how old I was. He was shocked when I told hem. "I thought you were approaching 50" he said. I was a little taken aback as my hair is white (I still have most of it) as is my beard. I guess it was flattering.

[Peter Tibbles]

Hey, won't someone come on and admit they lie about their age?
Okay, I'm 39.

[Cathy Warren]

When a person lies about their age they are lying to themselves only. Keep it real. Embrace your age and all that comes with growing older. We may be a bit weathered, but better for it.