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Tuesday, 29 January 2008

Broken Body Parts

By Edna Henkee of Grandma Henke

Take my ears for instance. I can hear fine - if there is one person talking. If the television is on and someone is talking, I don't have a clue what is going on. My daughter and her husband can hold conversations while four children are making noise and they are watching television. I used to could do that, so I must be broken.

I used to be a light sleeper and still get my rest. I knew exactly what was going on at all times when my kids were young. It was almost like magic how I could tune in and still get my sleep. Lately I've had nights when I've gone to bed before my man and wake up later and there he is snoring beside me. When and how he got there is beyond me. So then I have to wonder if just any old body climbed in my bed, would I snore on?

It's a fact that when my brain shuts down for the night it is completely off. The other night I got up in the middle of the night to pee. I'm sitting there on the cold pot and kind of doze off a little and then I can't remember if I'm just getting there or if I'm done. So then I start worrying that I'm not really awake anyway, that I am dreaming I got up.By then I remember I haven't gone yet, but I don't dare go in case I'm really in bed dreaming.

Of course, sometimes I have the opposite thing happen to my brain. I go to bed and it won't shut up. It flips from thought to thought to thought never staying on any subject long enough to do any good and it just won't stop! My on/off switch must be broken.

My thermostat is broken too. When everyone is cold, I'm sweating and wiping my brow. When they're hot, I'm wearing a sweater. I go to bed cold. I pile on the blankets and shiver and shiver. Sometime after I am asleep, my infernal (not a typo) heater sets itself on high and I wake up flinging off covers with both arms a-swinging. It's like my tender timer pops out and I am all of a sudden well done. Lynn says he could save me a bundle if he could hook me up to the heat pump.

My rememberer is broken, but it's not as broken as some people think it is. So what if I can't remember nouns (persons, places or things). I still remember important things like whose fault it is. Or whose turn it is. Or who touched it last. And as for my keys, purse, shoes, or glasses - I think there is a conspiracy going on. People move them around just to try to confuse me.

Things could be much worse. I could be grumpy and whiney and make everybody miserable. Maybe I am - and do - and I just can't remember.

Posted by Ronni Bennett at 02:30 AM | Permalink | Email this post


You made me laugh out loud, Edna. I can identify with everything you wrote. My only difference is in my thermostat. When I was in my forties I would wake in the middle of the night so hot I was flinging covers just like you. I thought there was something wrong with the furnace. I never did realize that I was having hot flashes until I read about them many years later. Talk about being unaware! Now I just go to bed cold and read until the down comforter absorbs the heat from my body and I can sleep.

Thank you for cleverly putting the problems that come with aging in a humorous light.

Very funny, as so close to home as to be sad, as well!

So funny, Edna. It's nice to know I'm not alone in this. Don't ever lose your sense of humor.

Great post, made me laugh out loud. Only because it's so right!

Edna, who needs persons, places or things? I hope that you take in all the changes with as much humour as you do in the telling. All the best to you and your rememberer.

Edna, who needs persons, places or things? I hope that you take in all the changes with as much humour as you do in the telling. All the best to you and your rememberer.

This is a great story. One that needs to be read over and over. It tells a different story each time I read it. The concept of things breaking but really not is fun and enlightening. We are all breaking down, but it's how we remember the important things that matter.

I loved the imaage of the tender timer popping out.

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