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Wednesday, 06 July 2011

Geezer Chic: The Ultimate Alternative Lifestyle

By Marcia Mayo who blogs at Well Aged With Some Marbling

We oldsters deserve some respect. And I don’t mean because of our wisdom or accumulated good works or the sacrifices we’ve made for our families. No, we deserve respect because of how cool and edgy we are.

Think about it. Many of the things that make young people cool, we also have. For example:

• They mark their bodies. Ours are already marked. With age spots, stretch marks and moles now all converging on my left breast, it’s starting to look like I have a tattoo of a phoenix. Or maybe it's a buzzard.

• They expand their ear holes for large posts. Ours are already expanded. I one time wore both of my earrings in the same hole for an entire day and nobody noticed.

• They ride around on odd cycles. So do we.

• They often don’t remember what they did last night. We don’t remember what we did this morning.

• Pink and purple hair? We’ve got that covered. However, we just think of it as a nice rinse.

• They like their music out of the mainstream, as do we. When my mother gave my daughter, Molly, her car when Molly turned 16, there was a tape stuck in the tape player. The tape was polka music. I am not kidding here.

• They don't make much sense. Neither do we.

• They sleep late. We sleep early.

• They go to vintage stores to buy old clothes. We don’t need to.

• They’re wired. So are we – to our pacemakers and CPAP machines.

• They imagine a better world. We had it. It ended in 1970.

So, you see, if we can corner the market on cool, we can have the same advantages as young people. Advantages like getting reservations for dinner at the newest trendy restaurants (as long as they open by five and have doggie bags) and starring in our own reality shows.

However, instead of The Bachelor, ours could be The Widower. We could bake pies and drop them by his house.

If I only knew how to bake a pie.


[INVITATION: All elders, 50 and older, are welcome to submit stories for this blog. They can be fiction, non-fiction, poetry, memoir, etc. Instructions for submitting are here.]

Posted by Ronni Bennett at 05:30 AM | Permalink | Email this post

Comments

And have you noticed how fashion-forward the new hearing aids are? My husband's behind-the-ear models make him look like a secret agent man.

Nice piece, Marcia!(And I love your blog title -- will visit and say hi.)

Great! We are sooo cool. Too bad the other generations don't realize it - but one day they will.

Geezer chic! Love it!

WOW! Marcia....Thanks for letting me know how cool I am!

Great piece...

yeah and we got to see all the cool bands!

Marcia I do hope you've considered putting these great blog pieces together. What a great read it would make!

What a hoot. I laughed so hard my side aches. Thanks for brightening my morning.

You have a funKNEE style, my knees have new parts and are not so fun.

Keep us laughin all the way to the.............whatever.

Oh, just knew there had to be "Geezer Chic," and now you have confirmed it. A delightful read. Thanks.

When I did my 1st piece here I billed myself as "The Widower"
As far as baked cakes delivered I got 1 (one) pot of home made chicken soup.
Great piece - Keep it up

Your blog made my day! Thanks! P.S. I have just returned from Atlanta. I loved the aquarium!

Marcia - This was great!

Now if only I can convince myself that my brother-in-law's hearing aid is no different than my granddaughter's IPOD ear piece, and that my cluster of varicose veins are similar to some cute young thing's suggestively positioned tattoo! - Sandy

Can only second all of the above, loved it all. thanks...

Love it, as always! I can't phrase it as cleverly as you, but I was "green before green was in," and my kids just thought I was cheap! Now they and their kids recycle and everything!

Gawd--all those decades of dressing for work, putting on makeup, thinking your outfits defined you...Now I dress for comfort, which in summer includes one of a number of saggy but clean and comfy tee-shirts, some of 15+ years vintage, equally baggy shorts, simple backless sandals, and no makeup.

My biggest fashion wonder is where my eyebrows went sometime in my fifties...? Ah, the freedom of age!!

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