Monday, 10 October 2011
Death and Dying
By Mary B Summerlin who keeps a photostream at Flickr
I stood on the little back porch during a light rain peering through the lattice work fence trying to deal with my muddled thoughts. My dying friend was having a very restless day and I was having a hard time dealing with my feelings.
It seemed to me that the view through the fence expressed the way I felt. I took some photographs, went back inside, sat down and wrote the following poem.
Sometimes so clear, Sometimes so cloudy.
As my friend lies dying
my thoughts go back and forth
Sometimes clear, Sometimes cloudy.
She is ready to go, hoped & planned for death to be
quick, easy and peaceful
But I see her full of anxiety, discomfort and
not peace.
Oh what a shame for someone who loved life,
conversation and company.
This was not on her list of things to do –
was not – was not!
It seems to me it is a trauma – not calm easy or peaceful
as she wished.
She felt she had lived a good and full life and was ready to go.
But instead she lingers in discomfort
Is it her body or life’s force that keeps her fighting?
I’m confused!
I wish you peace, my friend!
This was written September 22, 2011 at her bedside. She died quietly and peacefully in the company of family September 24, 2011.
[INVITATION: All elders, 50 and older, are welcome to submit stories for this blog. They can be fiction, non-fiction, poetry, memoir, etc. Instructions for submitting are here.]
Posted by Ronni Bennett at 05:30 AM | Permalink | Email this post
Comments
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Beautiful poem between two beautiful people. Thank you for sharing.
Posted by: Estelle D | Monday, 10 October 2011 at 07:38 AM
Sometimes one’s true feelings can only be expressed through poetry.
Posted by: Claire Jean | Monday, 10 October 2011 at 08:24 AM
So sad for you on loss of your friend; beautiful words and thoughts of her..how nice not to be deserted at those times..We all get better about these moments or events, but they are dramatic and full of real life feelings and that is probably as it should be...I will pass this on to friends who are living through same issues right now...Thank you for sharing this..
Posted by: Mary Follett | Monday, 10 October 2011 at 08:46 AM
The greatest gift, to be with a loved one as they leave this earthly place.
Thank you for sharing.
Posted by: Linda | Monday, 10 October 2011 at 09:40 AM
I guess change of any sort causes discomfort, birth, life and then death. Thank you for this poem and reflection. She was lucky to have you.
May peace be with her.
Posted by: joanne zimmermann | Monday, 10 October 2011 at 10:00 AM
Thank you all for your understanding.
Posted by: Mary B Summerlin | Monday, 10 October 2011 at 05:35 PM
Sorry I am late reading this today,Mary.
It is a beautiful poem and your friend was fortunate to have you as a friend.
Posted by: Nancy | Monday, 10 October 2011 at 07:35 PM
A good reminder that there are some things we just can't organise the way we want them - but I'm sure your thoughts and presence contributed to her peace at the end.
Posted by: Jeanette | Monday, 10 October 2011 at 07:39 PM
Your friend died knowing how wealthy she was--she had your love and friendship.
Posted by: Jeanne Follett | Monday, 10 October 2011 at 08:59 PM
So sad but so inspirational.Just shows how important friendships are.
Posted by: johna ferguson | Monday, 10 October 2011 at 09:07 PM
You were a very caring person to your dying friend. We would consider ourselves lucky to have a friend like you when it is our time to go.
Posted by: Darlene | Tuesday, 11 October 2011 at 09:32 AM
I am so sorry that you lost such a good friend, but I know that the grief work of writing about her is the best way to deal with your sadness. And you did such a lovely, sensitive job of it, too.
Posted by: Lyn Burnstine | Friday, 14 October 2011 at 07:55 AM
Thank you Mary. Lovely.
Posted by: Nancy Lazinsky | Monday, 17 October 2011 at 03:00 PM