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Friday, 24 August 2012


By Stroppy

Old Age makes me very stroppy at times and this is definitely one of those times. I have plantar fasciitis (sore feet ++) sometimes known here as policemen's heel.

To add insult to injury, I am experiencing severe leg cramps too. There are no circulatory problems and I take magnesium daily.

For these situations, I resort to what I call my Quirky Verses to help keep me sane and the mind off the pain. Also, my family can engage with these, they get a bit embarrassed with my more serious writing. Does anyone else have this reaction from family?


Me dear old Mum suffered from cramps

I never showed I cared,

She said “they’re bloomin’ excruciatin’

every night, in bed.

They wake me from a peaceful sleep

grabbin’ me legs in a vice,

and squeeze the life right out of me.”

It didn’t sound very nice.

But I just sat there in silence,

not really taking it in,

her doctor knew all about it,

I thought I’d leave it up to him.

But now it’s another story

I’ve turned another page,

it’s my turn now to suffer from cramps

it seems I’ve reached old age.

And the cramps they come to me nightly

they’re doin’ me head right in.

Oh! they squeeze me muscles so tightly

I said, to me eldest son Jim.

He said “Mum go see your doctor,

he’ll fix it up, you’ll see.”

I knew what he was thinking

“please don’t bother me.”

Now I take me pills diligently

just like me doctor said

And with Emu oil I rub both legs

before I go to bed.

It’s said to be therapeutic

it really isn’t just by chance,

no wonder it works so bloomin’ well,

have you ever seen an emu with cramps.


[INVITATION: All elders, 50 and older, are welcome to submit stories for this blog. They can be fiction, non-fiction, poetry, memoir, etc. Please read instructions for submitting.]

Posted by Ronni Bennett at 05:30 AM | Permalink | Email this post


Dear Stroppy,
Your verse was great!!! My husband had cramps last night. He got up and drank 3 glasses of water and feels the lack thereof during the day was what caused the problem. I didn't know about magnesium helping. Will tell him.
Your attitude via verse left me smiling. Hope things turn around for you.
Michigan Grandma

I've had those horrible cramps from time to time and discovered how to stop them before they get bad. If I'm in bed and feel a cramp coming on, I get up as fast as I can and put my weight on the leg that's starting to cramp.

It works really well. I haven't had a full knotted-up muscle3 cramp in my legs for years now. I've also seen others recommend this method on the AARP website.

Oh yes, I've have those terrible cramps, the ones where I nearly break my leg getting out of the bed fast enough. Mine are under control now by me taking muscle relaxers. My feet have not been diagnosed like you but they have been so swollen and hurt so bad that I said it felt like a giant had taken my feet and crushed every bone in them then put them back on and said "now walk". I don't have it now - it came, it went. I'm glad you found relief from pain by writing- sometimes I did. My oh my your writing opened up a river in me. Obliviously I related. Thank you.

I used to have terrible cramps in my feet and my calves when I had to wear high heels every day to work. I tried nearly everything to treat them -- doctors were no help, saying "don't wear heels" when my boss said I must. The only thing I found that helped at all was getting into the hottest water in the tub that I could stand and flexing my feet and legs. After a few minutes the cramps would go away and my skin was lobster-red.

Then my problem was trying to get back to sleep!

I don't have them, but a good friend does. I'm going to enjoy printing out and giving to her this post and the comments.Who knows, it might help. And don't forget potassium.(banana a day!)

I like your poem and your sense of humor. Most children don't want to accept illness or depression in their parents until they have to. In regard to the cramps,try flexing the foot of the affected leg and/or try a little Benadryl if it is OK with your doctor.

Sorry to hear about the cramps. Funny, I'm suffering from the same kind of back ache my mother did! So I can really relate. Good luck on the cramps. The AARP method works for me when I get them. That and flexing my foot. Hope these ideas help.

Pretty funny and ironic, 'cause I rarely have leg cramps -- until last night and suddenly this morning for a bit after I sat down in this chair. H-m-m-m Not the power of suggestion, 'cause I hadn't yet read your cute verse here.

When I have had them, I, too, immediately swing my body around to sit on side of the bed. My body weight plus my foot firmly on the floor usually ends the cramp -- must stay relaxed.

I rarely write directly about family. They only occasionally read what I write. I assured them in the very beginning that I would never write anything I remotely thought might be of questionable acceptance by them. Or, if I wasn't sure, I'd send it to them for their review first -- have never written anything I needed to send them and they've never objected to anything I've posted.

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