I Flunked Elder Online Dating – Part 2
Driving While Old

Yes, Another Elder Online Dating Post – Part 3 (Unplanned)

Yesterday's post, Part 2 of this series, was supposed to be the end of it. But two pertinent things happened that make it worth extending for a day – especially because I think the topic of elder dating deserves a bit more depth and humor than my experience gave it.

Over several years, I have accumulated a modest collection of DVDs about old age. A few are documentaries but what I am more interested in are dramas, in how filmmakers approach the subject and how well they carry through either in interpretation of what I already know or enlightening me anew.

Sunday I rewatched a Peter O'Toole movie from 2006, Venus. O'Toole plays Maurice, a London actor in the twilight of his years who falls for Jessie, a pretty enough but slovenly, education-impaired 20-something from the provinces sent by her family to care for Maurice's declining friend, Ian.

As A.O. Scott observed in his New York Times review, the movie provided the filmmakers with a “rare opportunity to show how complicated, how impetuous, how alive older people can be.”

And so O'Toole/Maurice is. His desire for Jessie (whom he renames Venus after his favorite painting) arrived unexpectedly, late in life after his career and fame have waned. A diagnosis of cancer shadows his attraction for the young women but not the joy she brings him as he shows her around his London, showering her with gifts and his longing.

The film is beautifully written, magnificently acted, a poignant meditation on old age, desire and love of living. David Ansen described it well at the time in Newsweek: “A heartbreaking comedy that is simultaneously funny and sad, raunchy and sweet, funky and elegiac.”

Here is the original trailer:

Venus is available to stream on Netflix and can also be found to stream, rent or purchase at Amazon, Itunes, YouTube, Google Play and other venues.

O'Toole received a slew of best actor nominations for Venus including the U.S. Academy Awards. He died in 2013, leaving us with a library of great films portrayals that will always be there for us to watch again.

My second find turned up yesterday. I don't remember from whence (you know how it goes clicking around the web). This is an entirely different mood and is, unlike O'Toole's movie, specifically about elder dating.

First you need to know about Australia's annual Tropfest, said to be the world's largest festival for short films. It began in 1993 and now involves venues in 33 countries, according to Wikipedia.

This little film, titled Makeover, won second place at the 2014 Tropfest. Even though you, like me, will probably figure out what's coming, that doesn't make it any less funny and wonderful.

Elder Dating Part 1
Elder Dating Part 2

At The Elder Storytelling Place today, Henry Lowenstern: TV Baseball


I can 't imagine liking a film about an old geezer who hits on a girl young enough to be his granddaughter. (I find that disgusting in real life.) But If I ever get a chance to see it, I'll try to keep an open mind based on your review.

Well I found it excruciating, could hardly look lol. OMG the hair in the ears is not a good look, do the dating sites mention it at all?

Disney made films and a theme park build around this lyric:

Fairy tales can come true
It can happen to you if you're young at heart.
For it's hard, you will find
To be narrow of mind if you're young at heart.

Get it? We have to stay young at heart. Anything can and will happen.

Couldn't bring myself to watch wonderful Peter. It would just bring me down!
However, we did get a real kick out of the 2nd short film.
The human comedy.

Enjoyed the short, and looking forward to watching Venus this weekend. It looks both engaging and life supporting. Thanks for part 3.

I saw "Venus" in the theater at the time it came out. I had read all the accolades, and I had always liked Peter O'Toole, so I looked forward to it.

Alas, I did not like the film at all. It seemed to me to be just one more old man hitting on someone decades younger than he is. Can you imagine a film in which the genders were reversed--an old woman obsessed with a young man? Such a female character would be looked upon by critics as pathetic, not heroic. I'm just as interested in battling sexism as ageism, and the constant tendency in Hollywood to pair aging male stars with young chickies while simultaneously consigning actresses over 40 to the dustbin is really irritating.

What I'm interested in seeing is old people having genuine romantic relationships with people in their own age group.

One of the reasons that I have enjoyed both 'Exotic Marigold Hotel' movies (despite less-enthusiastic newspaper reviews for the second) is that they portray older people as individuals...and their romantic connections are with other 'older people'.... The wonderful actors (especially Judi Dench and Maggie Smith) and the ambiance and colors of India make them a treat, too, as far as I'm concerned.

What a great way to end this series of blogs about dating! Lighthearted and enjoyable!

Definitely will watch "Venus." If there are any widows like me here, you might enjoy "And So It Goes"...with aging Diane Keaton and Michael Douglas (though Douglas looks like he's had a facelift, ugh!). At any rate, it's a comedy/drama about two widowed people finding romance. I love Diane Keaton, so it was a treat for me. And again, it's about two mature/older adults finding love after being widowed. It's on Netflix, one of their latest additions.

Actually, there is a film that reverses the roles, called The Mother with Anne Reid and Daniel Craig - and don't forget Harold and Maud.

From my memory of the Peter O'Toole film, his passion for the young woman is not expressed directly to her. He knows it is not going to happen but still wants to be with her.

Makeover was a hoot! Ha Ha!

Verify your Comment

Previewing your Comment

This is only a preview. Your comment has not yet been posted.

Your comment could not be posted. Error type:
Your comment has been posted. Post another comment

The letters and numbers you entered did not match the image. Please try again.

As a final step before posting your comment, enter the letters and numbers you see in the image below. This prevents automated programs from posting comments.

Having trouble reading this image? View an alternate.


Post a comment

Your Information

(Name and email address are required. Email address will not be displayed with the comment.)